This year I skipped the midnight write to go to a Halloween ball, so I'm a little behind already. I only wrote 187 words today! You need 1667 per day to make the 50,000 word goal.
But I'm not worried. The book I'm doing is a wholesale start-over of an idea I've had for a long time that I wrote a draft of in 2006. I'm very excited about the fresh concept and dove in with great zeal.
The book has the structure of How to Make an American Quilt, the Southern female voices of Steel Magnolias or Divine Secrets of a Ya Ya Sisterhood, and the emotional terrain of The Memory Keeper's Daughter. I am thrilled to be writing back in literary style, and have filled my head with my favorite influences as I begin writing -- Margaret Atwood, Edmund White, DH Lawrence, and John Updike.
Good luck to all you fellow fast-draft novelists!
The blank page stared at me like a great ghostly eye.
I might have punched it in the eye, had it not been a $600 Apple Cinema monitor. The apparition element was all my own.
But there was a reason for the empty screen. I had begun my fourth venture into National Novel Writing Month, pledging to write 50,000 words in 30 days.
And I had nuthin’.
All the novels from the previous years lined up inside my head. All were good books, a literary piece, a women’s fiction, and a middle grade low fantasy. I’d finished them all in the late winter after each NaNoWriMo, gone through peer critiques and rewrites, and felt pleased with the end results. One had won a contest. The latest was still being considered for representation by an agent.
But still, a lot of hours, a lot of my life, and a huge chunk of my energy and emotion had gone into them. And for what exactly? A file lying resident on a hard drive.
The cursor blinked quietly, ever patient. I started at the malevolent screen, empty, mocking.
Had I neglected my kids to do this? My business? Was the tradeoff worth the end result?
I leaned back in my chair, thinking maybe I wouldn’t participate this year. Or, sign up, hang out with the friends I’d made through NaNoWriMo and type gaily here and there, but not push to finish.
Then, somewhere, far back in my reptilian brain, I remembered a moment, a gesture, a bit of conversation, a big laugh, and then a character came full blown, and I placed her in a scene. Then her motivations came tumbling out, what she’d do under pressure, mixed in with a setting, a chance opportunity, and suddenly, I had an idea for a novel.
For any of us who create art in all its forms, what we do is not a choice, time wasted, or moments lost. It’s who we are, what makes us get up in the morning, and hopefully, if we’re really really good, really really perserverant, AND really really lucky, one day we will break out, get our art before others, and someone else will understand and connect with what we’ve done.
We’re 20 days into the race for 50,000 words. I hit 30K last night. I’m slightly off pace, but in good shape to finish on the 30th. During the same 20 days, I’ve done 30 photo shoots, created seven new holiday card designs, printed a heck of a lot of pictures, and written an article for About.com.
AND cleaned my daughter’s bedroom, helped with homework, had kids over for playdates, and baked at least six dozen cookies.
I think I’m going to get it all done.
As long as I don’t sleep.
Oh, to look back on days that changed your life.
Most of them don't seem like much at the time. No racing pulse. No heart-thumping sound track. Probably not even a mention on your blog. I'd bet many red-letter days start out, and even finish, completely in the gray.
But on November 11, 2005, I arrived for the first time at a little coffee shop known as Austin Java. I didn't know anyone doing NaNoWriMo, but my life had taken a crazy and terrible turn in September, and I wanted to branch out, meet people, and figure out a way to re-engage with the world outside my problems. So I opened the big wooden doors and tentatively stepped inside.
Luckily, just to my left, a penguin sat on a table, the sign that the Austin NaNoWriMos were there. I sat down by two women, who let me know it was cheap wine night and to avail myself of a glass. They introduced themselves as Ivy and Audrey. "I'm trying to date her," Ivy said, by way of explaining everything. "But she isn't going for it yet."
A few minutes later, a fourth person, a 20-something guy who went by Fool, joined us.
The evening, greased by red wine and a sense of hilarity in trying to write novels on such a short timeline, caused us to laugh and joke and try to out-wit each other with ridiculous scenes. Audrey sang a song for us. When Fool came back from the bathroom talking about some poetic graffiti over the urinal, Audrey and I raided the men's room to check it out. This has led to a fine three-year career of leaving bits of poetry in bathrooms, and each time Java paints over our literary leavings, we put them back.
We all became tight friends, attending write ins together throughout the month, and pushing each other to make the goal of 50,000 words in 30 days. When November ended, we couldn't bear to part, so we formed the Austin Java writing company and have met every Monday night for the last three years.
This night has led to so many things for me. Continuing to write, for one, when I might have given up long ago. Finding several of my best friends in the world, including Audrey, Ivy, and Rebecca, who joined Java soon after. And teaching me about social circles way beyond my experience.
Next year I get the honor of photographing Audrey as she marries her longtime girlfriend in Canada, as well as Ivy also tying the knot with her girl. And the inspiration of all of them has led me to the novel I'm writing this year, Girl Crush, and pushing me to write comedy, which I'd never tried. But all this has also helped in retaining my faith that I am on the path I'm meant to travel--not safe, not settled, and not standing still. But moving forward, reaching out beyond my comfort zones, and always, following my dream to write.
That night I went home glad I had gone to a write in, relieved to realize I would not remain reclusive after all my life changes, and proud to be writing so fast and so well under difficult circumstances.
But I had no idea that the trajectory of my life had really fired off at that moment, that the testing phase was past and I'd grown into a far more relaxed, open, and freely expressive person than I had been in a very long time, and this would change everything.
For the last year, 28-year-old Zest has been too busy to worry about her marriage. Cade was a good guy, and they had always enjoyed a steady, easy relationship. He had encouraged her to ditch the corporate marketing job she hated and open her own photography studio. He could support them both while she got started.
The first year of her studio, their fifth year of their marriage, was their best. He helped her clear out the darling little historic house on 5th St., install the background systems and lighting rails. They spent all their time together, focused, happy about their future.
But then her studio began to succeed. She felt the tug away from him, but the days churned by, and she kept hoping to establish equilibrium, find a balance between work and Cade. He began to resent the time away, then to fill the empty spaces, and just as Zest felt she could slow down, maybe even hire an assistant to ease her load, she came home to hear this on their answering machine:
Cade! Brian here. I got your call and have started the paperwork like you said. It should be ready for you to look over in a couple days. And here I always thought I'd be the one to get divorced first. But I'll handle it for you. Might as well put all this law school debt to work. Maybe I'll even charge you double.
Brian paused for a moment, then said.
Cade, are you sure? I mean, I still remember that day of your wedding, when we hid in some mop closet so Zest wouldn't know we'd seen her in her dress. You were so damn happy, peering through the crack in the door. It's hard to imagine how you got here. Just let me know, buddy, okay?
Zest sat for a moment as the machine clicked and reset itself to zero. He was divorcing her. She heard his car door slam and hurriedly reset the recorder to show the message as new. Then she dashed into the kitchen as if she'd just arrived herself, digging through her purse so that when he entered, she could pop her head up and say hello to the man who would shortly no longer be her husband.
This year I'm planning to write a romantic comedy called Girl Crush. Here's the premise:
I got the idea for Girl Crush when one of my friends, while planning an elopement to California, asked another couple, also friends of ours, to elope with them. I was asked to be their photographer.
Both couples will marry in the spring, separately, and I am breaking my no-wedding rule to document both their ceremonies. They are both going to Canada, however, since the situation in California is a little tenuous with the constitutional amendment coming to a vote in November.
The story will be told from the point of view of the photographer, who is going through a divorce and learns more about love and commitment from these women in three days than in her own heterosexual marriage.
This November will be my fourth National Novel Writing Month. I blogged my first two Nanos (I started late last year so I could not stop to blog) and will do so again this year. Here's 2005 and 2006 for the curious.
I'm very involved in the Austin group (known affectionately as the Penguins.) We've ranked as high as third in the world for our output. We have an extremely active group, with write ins more than once a day, and each year has been an amazing experience. Many of my best friends were discovered during the mad scrabble mayhem of writing 50,000 words in 30 days. This year we'll be pairing with the Writers' League of Texas to get even more publicity.
I've completed 50K all three years, and finished all of my NaNo books by April.
So, to plan for Nano, I will start posting the diary of Zest, my main character. Many of the softball team members will be mirrored after my friends, who all play for the Gay and Lesbian softball league here in town.
I'm very excited!


